Beginning Of The End

It's my turn to cry.

It's my turn to hurt.

It's time I sell out.

I can't take this anymore.

Being alone.

Being myself.

I tried being myself with a twist.

Trying not to get too involved in emotions.

But I'm not surviving.

Because it's not me.

In the end I always come out on the losing end.

I fell.

I lied.

I cried.

I lost.

Again.

You made me believe what I believed is good.

Yet it still hurts.

So I guess it's not so good afterall.

I love.

I hurt.

I died.

No new beginning.

...

I'm sorry.

I told you I didn't want to think much about it.

But I can't lie to myself.

For you have someone and I don't.

It's not fair.

The world isn't fair.

I was told that I came across as too strong.

If I was strong I wouldn't be hurting.

I was told I was smart.

If I was smart why am I still alone.

And yet after having said all this.

I don't blame the world.

I will still be the girl you can talk to.

I will still believe in love.

I will still be around to comfort.

And I still am happy for you.

To my beautiful perfect stranger:

I wish in my next lifetime I will meet you.

In time.

And hope that we can be.

It will not be too late.

To dream.

To believe.

To trust.

To love.

To be happy.

Together.